The Midnight Library

Stories that center around the “what ifs” and how a person’s life could have been different if alternative choices were made can sometimes be overly dramatic and telegraphed. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case with The Midnight Library. Written by Matt Haig, this novel is sort of like Sliding Doors except instead of the audience seeing how one decision (followed by a series of other decisions) can change the course of a person’s life, the protagonist (Nora Seed) in this book knows what’s going on and is ready to experience a long list of alternative lives.

If that sounds sci-fi, it is and isn’t. Nora finds herself in a parallel universe library (yep, you read that right) operated by her childhood librarian, Mrs. Elm. The lovely librarian explains to Nora that by “checking out” a variety of books in this library she can experience other lives she could have lived. The trick is that she doesn’t know how she gets to these places, has no idea how long she will be there, and has to pretend like she belongs. Her alternative lives take her all over the world and through a variety of jobs and situations including studying polar bears in the Arctic, performing stadium shows as a member of a huge rock band, and giving inspirational talks about her Olympic swimming career. Nora also experiences lives as a wife who co-owns a pub and a vineyard and, most significantly, she experiences being a mother.

Seeing her gain perspective on herself through the person she becomes across these different variations of her existence, as well as the people she meets and is surrounded by along the way, is fascinating. Her parents are dead in some lives, but alive in others. Her brother plays different roles depending on the career or country she inhabits. My favorite parts of each life is when she is dropped into the middle of these scenarios and she has to quickly gather clues about who she is and what’s going on before catastrophe hits. Or before the people around her think she’s lost her mind because she doesn’t “know” or “remember” commonplace things like the neighbor’s name, how to get to the grocery store, or what car she drives. Always the observant protagonist, Nora states, “This must be the hardest bit about being a spy…the emotion people store in you, like a bad investment. You feel like you’re robbing people of something.”

While two of the main themes of this book are clearly the importance of gaining perspective and finding ways to let go of regret, it’s also a love letter to libraries, librarians, and the seemingly infinite wisdom that comes from both: “Librarians have knowledge. They guide you to the right books. The right worlds. They find the best places. Like soul-enhanced search engines.” The one constant (other than herself) Nora has throughout her journeys is Mrs. Elm. There’s a lot to be said about that. There’s also a lot to be said about finding purpose and love. And that’s ultimately what Nora searches for (and arguably what every human searches for) and learns is more vital than anything else. “Sometimes just to say your own truth out loud is enough to find others like you.” That’s another big part of her revelations – finding her people.

Although this is not a popular opinion, the words/phrases “blessed,” “grateful,” and “be kind” get thrown around so much they have almost lost their meaning. Make no mistake, that doesn’t diminish the importance of being appreciative of what we have and choosing to be nice rather than an asshole (few and far between these days) but the overuse of those specific terms has turned them into buzz words that are often found on t-shirts and coffee mugs. It’s annoying.

What’s not annoying is the way Nora learns from the lives she gets to experience. She is given the rare opportunity to try on lives like pairs of shoes and then return to the library when she realizes that life wasn’t for her after all. “She realized that you could be as honest as possible in life, but people only see the truth if it is close enough to their reality.” Talk about perspective! Because Nora loves Thoreau, he gets quoted a lot in The Midnight Library but this quote is the one with the most essential viewpoint: “It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” No truer words. Sometimes people only react when they literally or figuratively see something for themselves and Haig, through The Midnight Library, gives the reader (and Nora) the chance to experience and discard the “what ifs” for good.

Quotes 

“Sometimes regrets aren’t based on fact at all. Sometimes regrets are…a load of bullshit.”

“It turned out to be near impossible to stand in a library and not want to pull things from the shelves.”

“Never underestimate the big importance of small things.”

“I’d want a rescue. And I wouldn’t want a bloody Maltipoo or a Bichon. I’d want a wolf. You know, a proper dog.”

“To be part of nature was to be part of the will to live.”

“Minds can’t see what they can’t handle.”

“She realized, in that moment, that she was capable of a lot more than she had known.”

“There was a net of love to break her fall.”

“You don’t have to understand life. You just have to live it.”

“Nora remembered what it was to care and be cared for.”

“It is quite a revelation to discover that the place you wanted to escape to is the exact same place you escaped from.”